From schoolboy’s tongue, no rhetoric we expect,
Posted in Explaining on July 28th, 2004 by avi – 3 CommentsRecipe for my favorite breakfast:
You start with a stick of butter. It should be salted butter. You can substitute this with margarine, but it’ll taste like shit. Now, this butter should be nice and cold and firm, so you have to make sure that you pull it straight from the fridge, don’t let it sit out and get soft.
Next you need 4 pieces of bacon, nice and crisp. Actually at this point you should probably put the butter back into the fridge, as it’ll get soft while you’re making the bacon. Don’t use any of that fancy pepper bacon or hickory bacon or any of that junk; just plain old pork bacon, cooked until it’s really crunchy and hard. It’s also fairly important that the bacon pieces be straight. So, make the bacon, then get the butter straight out of the fridge.
Next you need to make a pancake. You should probably put the butter back in the fridge. Actually, the bacon will get gross while you’re making the pancake too, so just throw that out (or eat it, you know, whatever.) So you make a regular old pancake. I usually use the Bisquick mix stuff, you just add some water and I think milk and kind of cook it up. Make sure the pancake is fluffy and not too gooey in the middle, ’cause that it just gross.
OK, so now you have a pancake, slap that in the oven on a low temperature to keep it warm, now make your bacon again. Once the bacon is hot and crispy, you have to do this next part real fast; You take out your stick of butter and put one piece of bacon along each long side of the butter. The bacon should stick to it, if you’ve done it right. Now you take your pancake out of the oven and wrap it around the butter and bacon, so you have kind of a taco, or maybe an enchilada. Now the key here is that the pancake is nice and warm but the butter is cold, so it’s a fun mouth sensation.
That’s it; you eat it with your hands. I like to dip it into a cup of syrup, but I have found it’s important to use the good syrup; not that fake imitation maple crap, or any kind of fruit syrup. You have to use the good stuff, the maple syrup that comes in a bottle shaped like Canada. You dip that on in there and eat it. It’s great.